Are you just about done with the anthology horror mini-revival? Sick to death of cinéma vérité? Well... I was about to say, "Move along, then; there's nothing for you here," but that wouldn't be fair on this movie OR you. If you're through with first-person perspective found-footage portmanteau horrors then fine, but just stay for one more. Please? Because it's a belter, this one. Last year's V/H/S was IMO terrific, but it had its flaws. The wraparound story and the first story proper gave the movie a disturbing early feeling of misogyny thanks to both stories' protagonists having sexual gratification of one manner or another as their principal reason for filming their actions, the film's running time struggled to cope with six tales being told, and the shaky first-person cameras were the shakiest of shaky, nausea-inducing cameras in the history of the first-person perspective. Thankfully for the sequel, nobody's shooting footage for the sake of amateur pornography (an early tit-shot establishes our wraparound-segment protagonist as a private investigator, but that's it until some much lighter, more jocular sex-filming exchanges in the last segment, of which more later), V/H/S/2 is telling five stories in all rather than six (hopefully by V/H/S/3 they'll have learned a further lesson: The wraparound stories are completely redundant, so let's ditch 'em), and that extra time is…

In the past I have only ever reviewed anthology films as a whole, and by-and-large that's probably what I'll go back to doing in the future, but having just watched the last three quarters of the original _V/H/S_, then _V/H/S/2_ and _V/H/S: Viral_ all in one sitting, it all sort of bleeds together and I mostly can't remember which one belongs where, so at least for now, I'm gonna try giving some very, very short reviews for each segment, rather than the overall films. **Tape 49**: The framing device. These were always the silliest part of the franchise. It doesn't work very well as a jumping off point, and it doesn't work at all as a self-contained narrative. **Phase I Clinical Trials**: Much better stuff from Adam Wingard, has some of the intensity found in the first _V/H/S_. One of the shorts I think would best translate to a full feature. Could benefit from some better acting though (could be said of all the segments, and isn't a deal breaker for me). **A Ride in the Park**: Really just one thing going on here, but that's fine for a short film that's just one part of an anthology. A first-person zombie movie shot from the perspective of the zombie is a pretty dope idea. Could have commited to the formula harder, preferably, but the way it is shot I guess makes sense in terms of the larger _V/H/S_ narrative. **Safe Haven**: The best of what _V/H/S/2_ has on offer. Not per…

90/100 The original V/H/S was excellent. This one blows it out of the water. Five tales of horror all filmed with hand held cameras, spy cams, eye cams, dog cams, etc. The stories aren't anything complex but they grab you by the throat and won't let go. Original, horrific, gruesome, disturbing and painfully memorable, there isn't a bad story in the bunch. Good, bloody, adrenaline fueled, terrifying fun! -- DrNostromo.com

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